Wednesday, April 27, 2005

The secret vice of Benedict XVI

The new Pope's dreadful vice has at last been revealed:

By Matthew Schofield, Knight Ridder Newspapers
Thu Apr 21, 6:20 PM ET

REGENSBURG, Germany - When he was a cardinal, Pope Benedict XVI often delivered sermons at the German-language church in Campasanto Teutonico near St. Peter's Basilica, but his most heartfelt talks may have been the ones he gave after celebrating Mass.

"I went with him once," said Konrad Baumgartner, the head of the theology department at Regensburg University. "Afterwards, he went into the old cemetery behind the church.

"It was full of cats, and when he went out, they all ran to him. They knew him and loved him. He stood there, petting some and talking to them, for quite a long time. He visited the cats whenever he visited the church. His love for cats is quite famous."

The new pope loves cats!

Surely now the antichrist is at hand. Surely the end of days is upon us. The smoke of Satan has entered the temple.

The new pope loves cats!

The world is divided into two classes: the children of light and the children of darkness, the elect and the non-elect, the sheep and the goats--in short, into dog-lovers and cat-lovers.

How easily we were all deceived. How smoothly the prince of lies took us in. Behind the gentle smile, the grandfatherly exterior, lies the heart of Ernst Stavro Blofeld: he sits on his elevated chair, caressing his cat with soft, sinister strokes-- while plotting plans for world domination and casually consigning 007 to a fiendish demise.

Soon it will be too late. Rome, known throughout the world as a city overrun by cats, will soon be under his spell. Every cat in Rome will now be congregating in St Peter's, chasing the humans out of the temple, and securing their base for the conquest of the world.

And the ancient oracle proves true: 5000 years ago in Egypt, cats were worshipped as gods.

The cats have never forgotten this.

St Michael, pray for us!


At Thursday, 28 April, 2005, Blogger Jeff Miller said...

God gave us cats so that we would have an example of how we treat him.

Mainly that we totally ignore him as we go about our lives, but when we want something we will start to purr and figuratively rub ourselves against his legs to gain his attention for our wants.

At Wednesday, 02 June, 2010, Blogger 蒜泥白肉Lynn said...



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